Some people never really leave high school. Even as adults you will still find them hanging out and spreading the latest gossip. The problem is that no matter how they go about it, a workplace gossip is killing their own career. It’s one thing to spend a few minutes chatting about the latest ball scores or last night’s, “Castle” episode, or to discuss the co-worker who has just returned from maternity leave, in a positive manner. It’s quite another to be dishing the dirt on anyone or anything at work. No one really trusts a gossip. If you pay attention, you will see that their careers are going nowhere fast. What does this have to do with you as you are hunting for a new job? The best resume and cover letter in the world isn’t going to change what your boss has to say about you when he or she is called. If you think that your boss either doesn’t know you are a gossip or isn’t going to say anything about it, you’re wrong. Your boss will mention it and it will hurt your chances at a new company. Gossips are rarely liked and it’s even more rare that they are trusted with sensitive material. More importantly, being a workplace gossip means you have two character traits that employers loathe; you have the potential to cause discord and you waste time. Gossip often harms people and relationships. This is bad for the work environment. An employer needs people who work well together and a gossip can often bring out the worst in people, not the best. The wasting time issue is self-explanatory. You are being hired to do a job, not talk about people. So what do you do if you have been the go-to person for the latest dirt? Knock it off now. A few weeks and people will forget all about your past as the ultimate gossip.
Last year I posted about not liking the term “resolution”–that I always seemed to fail miserably when I wrote down my New Years Resolutions, so instead I switched to ‘small attainable goals’. I can handle that. Like, ‘walk 20 minutes a day’, or ‘eat at least 2 vegetables a day’ (yes, V8 juice or a Bloody Mary counts), or ‘turn off the computer a half hour earlier than normal’.
So, I was thinking this year instead of making myself do things that I probably wouldn’t do ordinarily unless pressured (by resolutions for example), I would do more positive things for me. 2009 was a very, very busy year for me. I hired a savvy small business consultant who not only redesigned my website, but also taught me the value of developing partnerships, while helping me become more productive and efficient with my business processes. My business increased 500% in a matter of months. My work days went from 6 to 16 hours followed by about 4 hours of sleep. Spring turned to Summer, and Summer to Fall and I never set foot outside to enjoy the seasons. As thrilled as I have been by this whirlwind of success, I knew I needed to scale back and take a break. I would read tweets on Twitter that would leave me wailing, “How does she have time to do an HOUR of yoga? Or read a book? Who has AN HOUR??” Between work, home, children and family, there was time for nothing else. The pity party wasn’t pretty. We all need time to ourselves. Time to decompress. Time to do whatever we want–watch TV, read a book, meet a friend for coffee or a meal, spend time with our families or our children, or do nothing at all. Time to ourselves. We don’t have to be super people. We get burned out and our focus becomes fuzzy, replaced with a burning desire to justrest. If we become deprived of it, our creativity, drive, and motivation recedes and we live life on autopilot. The more down time we can get in a day, the more balanced our lives will become. So, I made a plan.
2010 would continue to bring in more business, but I would cut back. For my health. And my sanity.
First,my health. I gave up Aspartame. As addicted to Diet Coke and sweet-n-low as I was, I knew it was not healthy for me. Yes, sugar is bad too, but in my opinion, not as bad as Aspartame, so I will take the sugar instead. So far, so good. I will also walk or do exercise of some form every day to get the blood flowing. Sitting on my butt all day in front of the computer isn’t wonderful for the body either.
I also started drinking green tea. Frankly, I’m not quite sure what it is supposed to do for me, but if the world (and Dr. Oz) is raving about it, then it must be a good thing. So I got a pretty red tea kettle for Christmas, stocked up on green tea, and resolved to drink two cups a day. I am hoping my body is happy about it, but I think it’s too soon to tell. Have you done something for your heath? A small change? Or something big? Can you feel a difference?
Second, down time. I used to be a reader… at least 4 books a week. In the last 6 months, I have read 2 books. Oh, the withdrawal symptoms I’d have. I’d pass by the book section at the supermarket and touch the covers, promising them I would be back to read them some day. Or I would buy them and then put it on the stack with the other untouched books. The last week of December I read a book. Now I am on #2 and darn happy. I feel more… relaxed, satisfied, balanced. It’s the little things. Have you given yourself any down time lately? If you haven’t, do it now. Even if you are job searching. You can only search so many hours in a day. Take the rest of the time to rejuvenate your spirit by doing something you love. I promise you, you will go back to the job search the next day with a renewed passion for it.
Third, friends. I miss my friends. I need them around me.Being with friends uplifts me. We laugh til it hurts and we say what we want. After 10 hours of serving others (clients) all day, it is great to be with those who I can be myself with. When is the last time you talked to, or spent time with a friend? Can’t remember? I know what you mean. Call them now and set up a time to get together.Not only is being with friends good for the soul, but it’s also a great networking tool. How many times have you talked to a friend and the conversation turned to work? Use those opportunities to let everyone know you are job searching.
New Years doesn’t have to be all about exercise and discipline and broken resolutions. It can be a commitment to yourself – to get yourself to a place where you are happy and contented again. Be kind to yourself and acknowledge what your body is telling you. The job or the job search will always be there the next day, so spend a few minutes doing something that makes you happy.
Happy New Year.
